Look at her,
Perfect hair, yet all alone
Still sitting there
You wonder what goes through her mind
Is it loss?
Is it love?
Maybe it’s none of the above
As she sits alone
Her smile begins to fade
Another day, through a
Parade of people big and small
Who seem to have no insecurities at all
When she looks in the mirror,
She feels like what shouldn’t be,
Couldn’t be clearer
She smiles off the feelings inside
But what shouldn’t be
She just can’t hide
Yet again, she sits alone
Simply staring down at her phone
They think that no one cares
About the one girl who screams inside
Afraid of the fears she can no longer hide
What’s in My Mind
What are you thinking about?
What do you want?
What’s your future?
What do you need?
What do you want to be?
What are you doing?
What’s in your mind?
All theses questions,
What’s in my mind?
Other people’s opinion,
Beauty of humanity,
I can die for you but,
Can I live for you?
Can i live for myself?
Am I even allow to life for myself?
What’s in my mind?
Don’t eat too much,
Don’t wear that,
You look like a slut,
You can’t do it
That’s not for you,
Don’t act like that,
I know what you need,
You are nothing,
I don’t trust you,
That’s what you put in my mind.
They told me to speak up,
Never suffer in silence
But then I open my mouth,
And I’m met with violence.
I act as though it doesn’t hurt,
But nothing’s ever hurt more
Blood seeps through my clothes
As I lie on the floor.
I hope they don’t find me,
That I die alone.
I probably deserved it,
I should never have shown,
My pain and my suffering
To the world outside.
They said they’d meet me with kindness
But they chose to hide.
They left me for dead,
But I was already dead inside
Because the system failed me,
And not only me.
It’s failed everyone around me,
And that’s clear to see.
I don’t want to fight
Because there’s nothing to fight for.
Everyone will smile,
They’ll be there for a while
But when I ask for help,
They’ll walk out single file.
I choose not to fight,
In the hope that my absence
Will cause others
To take note of their actions.
But that’s where I’m wrong,
Nothing will change.
We’ll lose hundreds more,
That could’ve been saved.
I hope people realize what they’ve done,
Take a look at the world,
See what it’s become.
See the mess that we’ve made
The lives that we’ve lost.
And maybe one day,
The system will change.
Maybe one day, people like me
Will be met with kindness
And have their worries set free.
Be a Man
Open up love,
Talk to me,
I know that sorrow lies beneath
The mask that says that it’s all fine.
I want you to know that your worries are mine.
He plasters a smile and forces a laugh.
He believes vulnerability makes him half
The man his father wants him to be.
He won’t let a tear slip until she leaves.
He remembers the stinging, shameful pain.
As his father growled his name
Holding up a Barbie doll,
His treasure, suddenly, his pitfall.
He remembers the way they slagged off a boy
For crying in the school hallway.
Emotion, apparently, made him weak
A lacking boy, pathetic freak.
You’re too small, too weak, too thin
Don’t cry about it
Keep it all bottled in
A girl wants a big strong man to depend on
Become that or this life will be long, son
And girls think they don’t cause this too
Boys aren’t blind to they way you value
Speed and muscle, buff and brawn
Over sensitive words and tearful mourns
No wonder boys keep all the pain in
It’s this god damned, messed up world we live in
Be smart, be strong, be rude, be tough
Toxic masculinity is becoming too much.
They told us that these were the days the days to remember
How could I forget,
When I’ve been stuck here since September.
This isn’t what I imagined,
When they said fourth year was great,
I saw myself drinking and staying out too late.
But now that I’m here,
On my own every day,
They say I’m the lucky one
Because I’ve a place to stay.
They say they understand
What it’s like for me,
But they know just as much about the bottom of the sea.
Nobody knows what goes on inside my head,
All they keep saying is
There’s brighter day ahead.
I used to have hope,
Have faith in the system,
When the Taoiseach stood up,
I used to listen.
Now I close my eyes and wish it away,
But I’ve come to realise,
The nightmare is here to stay.
Everyone wants to look like you
Pretty girls should be happy
So why aren’t you
You’re not worthy of help
Your cries are just for attention
But who are you to seek more attention
Everyone looks at you
Not for the right reasons
They call you a slut
And not without reason
Don’t show your emotions
Cause then you’ll seem weak
But if you bottle them up
Then you’ll become weak
Don’t talk back
They’ll use it against you
Keep your mouth shut
And they’ll use it against you
Don’t voice your opinion
Everyone will laugh
You’re just a pretty face
For someone who wants ass
The photos on my wall, stare down at me as I sleep,
Each one a distant memory,
Strong enough to make me weep.
The people in the pictures, now unrecognisable to me,
Each of them strangers,
How could I not see?
Where are they now?
God only knows,
When I will see them again,
It’s the life that I chose.
What is It?
Am I living? Am I dreaming? Do we really know what’s a true feeling?
Discovering yourself ain’t always that appealing, but holding it back is when the sky starts peeling.
Going to bed thoughts circle my head, what’s the difference in alive and dead.
You will never know, know till that day, when the holy gates come and take you away.
Do you ever get, get that feeling, questioning your world and your true meaning,
Feeling spiral thoughts, thoughts, thoughts turn to things,
So wake the hell up stop reminiscing.
You don’t find yourself your life you created,
Your Michelangelo carving your own David.
Don’t dwell on the past the past you can’t change it,
Focus on today and what you’re gonna make it.
People around us are somewhat and illusion,
If them accepting you is causing some confusion,
Cut them right off,
Not worth your time accepting and affecting,
Such a fine line.
Why are we here, what are we doing,
Why am I even getting up in the morning?
Why am I reading and calculating and writing,
Trying to be more intelligent, right?
Why am I measured
With an A or a C,
When none of this really interests me?
Why don’t I have time
To be with my friends;
I’m reading and calculating and writing instead.
I live with my family, I should see them every day,
Yet I just see them in the morning,
Only enough time to say ‘hey.’
I’m getting up and going to school,
Where everyone else always seems smarter than you,
But you work and you struggle,
Just trying to get through.
So I tell my friends that I have things to do;
As much as I’d like to go out with you,
There are things to do.
I’ll be trying to get good grades, then get a good job,
Like I’m supposed to want to.
But when will it end?
I can’t see the finish.
I won’t be out with my friends,
I’ll be reading and calculating and writing instead.
Where I’m Meant to Go
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You said not to start like this,
So that’s what i’ll do
I like ripped up photos and scribbled words,
I like boys that cry and girls that curse.
I like flowers, flattened thin as paper,
Like beauty can be saved forever.
I want roots that grow like steps to show,
Exactly where I’m meant to go.
Cause I don’t know.
No, I don’t know.
Please show me where I’m meant to go.
Dáil Éireann, what a mess
‘Ah here, they’re trying their best’
What if their best isn’t good enough
Don’t really care if your job is tough
Don’t sign up if you can’t take it
Don’t make a rule if you’re gonna break it
Don’t pretend like you’ve all made it
We all know you just fake it
Don’t forget who put you there
It’s not your friends from medical care
Give them info you shouldn’t share
Get away with it – that’s fair
You don’t represent me
Not me nor my family
We don’t lie, we don’t cheat
You’re all asses, so take a seat.
We live in a world where once you’re a teen, you long to blend in, its your dream.
From your appearance to the way you speak, where your biggest fear is being called a freak.
But once you reach a certain age you realise how bizarre that is to do,
You want to be thought of as in a group instead of just being you.
Bottling your different opinions and emotions up and feel like you want to shout,
But the truth is you can’t blend in when you were born to stand out.
I Come From
I come from the tea stains on the table and the watermarks on the shelf,
From the beer on the floor and wails from myself,
I come from the library where i’ve spent most of my days,
From the girl over there who holds my gaze,
I come from the lockers where i’ve stood and laughed,
From the bathrooms where i’ve sat and cried many more times
And from the voice getting louder every moment inside,
I come from long days wondering how to get the girl to like me,
Even though my mind says no, my mind says you’re not good enough,
Because no one is ever good enough for anyone,
That is the truth and that is what I see,
Although everyone, I think everyone, is better than me,
I ask myself what is it for if no one knows, except me, my voice and that girl I know.
They were as free as the wind,
They weren’t scared of anything.
Kings of their territory,
They weren’t counting their victories.
But even if they weren’t knowing,
Their worst enemy was coming,
Guns, bown and a lot if other weapons,
That were using humans on them to fraction.
They wanted to fight,
But even the smartest of them couldn’t light.
They had already lost in their heart,
Now all they can do is hide, waiting for a new start.
Though the hair was dyed blonde like her
The waist was slimmed down like her
The makeup was put on like her
I thought that I was like her but they only like her
And I’ve lost ‘her’
I am tired of regretting my past
So now, I live for my future
Nothing is changing even you wish to go back to the past
So if you don’t want to regret your past again
You need to live for your future
Like I am