Like the Wind
Like the wind, you blow me away
You gust sweeps me up and holds me tight
We move forward together
Playing flowing and dancing around
But the wind never lasts forever
The wind stops and I’m dropped in the trenches
Waiting for you to come back and sweep me up again
The Way I Am
In an all white area, to an all white school,
In an all white playground, following their rules.
I’ve grown up this way, its all I know
But act your colour is what I’m told.
You speak like them, dress like them,
You’re not black enough, you’re too black,
You’re too much to be one of us.
Im just a kid its the way I am
I shouldn’t have to prove myself if you don’t understand
We Wanna be Free
Us, you and me
There are chains that bind us
You can’t see them but there, there
In every word, someone says in every laugh and stare
They say we are as fragile as a flower
But they have no idea of our real power
We use more strength than you will ever know
We are like hundreds of little fireflies waiting to glow
And once the day is gone and night starts
We will shine till dawn
Are our freedom will spark
Up and Down
Up and down not the whole way round
Not the full schilling about her,
A broken chancer
Eyes shine like a fireplace
With no flame
In your case
Packed and ready slow and steady wins the race
Or so they say
Light a match see the flame
Smoke it up or blow it out
Brain the chain
Pyromania light the way
To the deep internalized golden flame
Soaring, roaring above our heads
Their bodies as light as air
Maybe we too could be like them
If we weren’t burdened down with care
One dares to droop to the poisoned land
Their glossy gaze contrasts mine
My eyes shadowed with stifling oppression
There’s a hopeful shine.
Sometimes I wonder how we got here
Sometimes I do not care
Because in the end we are here
In a world that isn’t fair.
It’s not just the oppression
Or the lack of personal space
Or even the harmful attitudes
But the society without a face.
The Seeds of a Child
You were excited at first
You watered it every day
The water would seep through the soil
And you watered me so much that I overflow
But that’s the thing about the excitement of a child
You soon forgot about your plant
You went days on end without watering me
Until me was begging for a single drop
Then you grew up
And just forgot about your plant
The Deep Divide
Through the paths and trees of broken stone,
Two girls walk alone,
One of bubbles and the purest of faces,
The other rough with a lack of graces,
Too close and yet so far,
A deep divided heart, barely a scar
Pain anew and yet so old,
The ageing story of the “bold”
Being different isn’t brave,
It’s a sin to pay and dismay,
There are none without fear,
Simply ones who’d rather disappear.
Both girls all alone,
Shamed and cut out until they atone,
The sin they broke of being a colour,
Cutting shapes out of black and white and getting duller.
“Send them off to be fixed”
The only repair they receive is that of the lies they premixed.
Never happy, but others smile,
And endless façade unfathomably vile.
Happiness a word, we can hear
But not all can feel it
They say were wrong, if without it
A myth, legend
What is it?
A feeling of uplift, without care
But maybe there more over there
Without it your just fine
No need to cry
One day you will feel accepted in this life
Behind that big bright smile
Shows her true profile
“perfect, beautiful, happy” to all she knows
But deep down so desperate to just let go
But no more
For its time for her to open a new door
She decided to let go of all that pain
And ignite a brand new flame
She has a burning passion for change
To no longer feel so strange
She no longer will be broken
She has awoken
My Story is Simple
My story simple and true to myself.
But people twist it and say I’m a sinner.
I’ve struggled so long and finally accept
That I’m not the one who needs help.
So now I say it proudly,
I’m not a girl and now I feel like a winner.
I turned on my half-charged computer and climb out of bed
Knowing what was ahead of me would leave me in dread
I never interact, I rather others do the talking
But today was different, I wasn’t left yawning.
Every day has started feeling the same, merging into one
I couldn’t find the escape.
You log on and see the same tired faces
No one ever speaks everyone just gazes
Today felt different,
Like a normal day in the class,
Everyone laughing, sharing their thoughts.
Wishing we could go back to seeing the fun.
Kids these Days
Gazes aimed at our phones,
Messing, fighting, drinking, smoking
Judged for every shakey breath and clumsy step
Surley every kid is not like this?
But this is what is assumed
Based on looks, speech, race, sexuality
By those owning older years of “wisdom”, boasting greater lives
With darling daughters and strong sons, nothing will go wrong
This is not how we truley are,
Most hiding scars of pain
That will never leave, instead of advice told to deal,
With never ending thoughts, an ebbing voice in our head
Never going away.
Skipping meals, making deals
Breaking hearts in the dark
Skin as paper although life clearly isn’t a written fairy tale
Kids these days.
More to Life
I never knew it even existed. Thank god that I got a not so rude awakening,
For I never would have learned the meaning of self-love and self-acceptance.
I was close minded before, and found a nice place for myself in the crowd,
Always hiding my likes and dislikes because they weren’t “cool” and different to all the others.
Little did I know that they were the things I would soon love most about myself.
Individuality is the most beautiful thing human beings have to offer,
So maybe treat the different people a little softer.
If you let the society determine who you are
You will just be waiting to be up to par.
There is more to life then scrolling on a screen,
I hope you come to realize that rather the wasting your teens.
The anger that will blind me, my heart that does confine me,
My brain will shout and my body will crouch,
My life an endless battle with love.
Blindness that shows me the colours of hate, fear withholds me,
The knife blade cold against the skin, and the blood the drips down the path,
My body’s tearing, ripping a part,
And endless fight with vengeance consumes me.
People riddle to bounce back but never give the instructions,
The maddening silence and unpromising vows, my head goes pop with the pressure of lies.
How do I tell you that I don’t care.
Because I don’t.
I don’t care that you’re feeling down,
I don’t care that the bad thoughts are back,
I don’t care that people are being nasty again,
I don’t care.
I don’t care that you are lost,
I don’t care that death is seeming like the only option,
I don’t care that I’m the only one that listens,
I don’t care.
But see the thing is is that I don’t not care because I’m mean,
Or selfish, or any of the things you are thinking.
I don’t care because I can’t, can’t let my own fears
And worries and hopeless hopes breach the barriers
I have to put up every time you look for my caring,
Can’t let myself lie awake at night wondering
If you’ll be there in the morning,
Can’t let the tears on my pillow be for you.
So next time, when you come to me with your head in your hands
Because the world is too much, just know that I don’t care.
It’s not personal, just survival.
It’s so very difficult
To be so resilient.
When you’re smothered and tethered.
Brain clustered and cluttered.
I’m so on my grind.
Teaching or nursing?
I’ll ignore and repress
I’ll never stop working.
The chains hold us tight to the wall
The darkness crashes onto the glimmers of hope
He calls me yet again
“Things will change”
Yet the thoughts stay the same
Feels like we will never be happy again.
I’m an incredible machine.
You throw it I’ll take it!
Plastic, I’m perfect.
My psyche an earthquake.
In the year 2020 I’ve seen so much,
I’ve learned how to love others without touch,
I’ve developed relationships through a screen,
Know I wonder how I would have been.
Prior to this breakdown of the world,
My eyes were closed to such big things,
I now see and stand for others,
Racism, homophobia and much harder.
I see our world as a potential to change,
But we need to start and rewrite our ways.
Humans now have a voice,
We need to make a change,
Not only for ourselves,
But for the ones who are treated in inhuman ways.
Killing our creativity
We are losing who we were meant to be
We can’t flee
We live in a world that can be dark and wrong
But it is our fault if we let it destroy where we belong
We need to get up and fight
We can fight to reunite
Fight for inclusion
It can be more than just an illusion
We can have faith in who we are
In what we can do as long as we believe in what is true.
You’re so Lucky
“You’re so lucky you’re smart” they say
Everything must be so easy for you
Not held back by lack of understanding
Having all the chances in the world.
You don’t see the tears I withhold with a B
While I comfort you for your grade
Don’t feel the crushing guilt of my intelligence
Because I know I don’t deserve it.
I don’t think I’m lucky when I get an A
I don’t find everything easy, but I must
I hate myself for my ignorance
And for squandering all my potential.
I’m sorry that I’m smart
I didn’t pick my genes.
Wake up, cry, get dressed, drive
I can’t remain in these conditions.
You tell me this is life
But I’m telling you this is most definitely a lie.
Wake up, cry, get dressed drive
We’re so deeply in bedded in this lie that we call it life,
But where is the life we’ve all wanted
Where is the life we are free the life we can love who we want
And love what we do
The love we crave deeply just to alive but all we do is
Wake up, cry, get dressed, die
Is this what you truly wanted?
I am waiting for the world to open up,
I am sitting here waiting for the shadow to past,
Hugs at last,
I am lying here, hoping for change,
Let out of this cage,
I am excited for change,
Because I know at the end of the day,
We will all be okay.
‘Don’t stress’ they say.
Tell me how when I can’t wear a dress without feeling judged.
Tell me how when I can’t give my opinion without being silenced.
Tell me how when I can’t express my thoughts without feeling like a burden.
Tell me how when every decision I make could lead to the failure or success of my future.
Tell me how when my generation is made of depressed teenagers hiding behind humour.
Tell me how when I am told to ‘act like an adult’ while being told ‘you’re just a child’.
Please tell me how, I am begging you.
Dressed pretty in pink
But what will he think
All I want is to be loved
But is that enough
Does care only for my looks
Does he know I read books
Maybe to shut up is the best option
But I have an opinion
As a woman in a man’s world
This is absurd
Hear me, listen to my words
As I say this is enough
All the emotions hit like a train of thoughts.
The little kid dances full of life
Her flowy heaven like dress covering her fragile heart
Scarred with many worries,
Yet she dances to the sound of reassurance.
You Make me Feel
You make me feel like Icarus,
Flying higher and higher,
Out of reach to all but you,
Oh you are my sun, my light.
You make me feel like Icarus,
Full of hubris,
My wings ready to melt,
Oh you are my downfall,
My Achilles heel.
Back from School
Back from school, another day done
No drama today, at least lunch was fun
“It’s a nice day you, should go outside”
No thanks I have homework to do and three tests sometime.
I write and memorise and scramble my mind
About what x equals and why did that king die.
I look up from books and notes to see,
that no one ones awake except me.
I must finish this essay and memorise a few more lines,
But sleep is important, must I sacrifice?
I guess I’ll finish tomorrow if I have time.
I am Scared of Sharks
I am scared of sharks
Because they can hurt me,
Bodies being ripped in two, limbs flailing in splashing water, blood diluting in the salty sea.
I don’t know anyone that’s been hurt by a shark
My fear is just.
I am scared of lightning,
Because they can hurt me,
Pure energy shot through the body, melting flesh, burning skin,
I don’t know anyone that’s been struck by lightning,
My fear is just.
I am scared of men,
Because they can hurt me,
Unwanted hands against my skin, piercing eyes on the back of my neck, words that wound my soul,
EVERY woman I know has had unwilling encounters with men.
My fear is just,
But not understood.
I’m put down because, “its not all men”.
It is enough to cause concern
I am enough.
You said you were afraid to lose me
And then you faced your fears and left me
But now I’ve healed and grown stronger
And need not your love no longer
When the Pandemic is Over
When the pandemic is over, if ever it comes to an end
We reunite like lost wolves in the woods
Unable to touch or feel love from one another
Yet it feels as if finally it’s over for once!
It’s only over and fun for a bit
So focus of the present and not the past!
Not the future as we don’t know what comes.
Through the Door
The doors not open
And that’s ok with me
I don’t want to lock it
But I don’t want to leave it open
And I don’t want you to try
We can talk through the door
If you try open the door ill run
I’ll be with the trees
Screaming at the sky
Music in my mind
No thoughts of we
You can try meet me at the trees
But I’ll hide
Just leave me be
I’m not ready for a we
Does religion save as much as it kills
Are countries just gangs in political veils
Is war just a business we pay for in blood
Dreaming I don’t wanna die mama I’m too young
Does the preacher preach but don’t do as he preaches
Politicians talk but don’t walk how he speak
The most important things in life come free
You can pay for a bed but you can’t pay for sleep
Covid-19 go away please
Just try not to sneeze
Have to eear a mask
If you need a Covid test, just ask
Go to the doctor if you wheeze.
When I was young, I’d prayed to god every day wondering why he’d made me this way,
Always distraught, never content I was concerned why no one could see the true extent.
All I could see was suffering while I wrapped my arms around myself
To try and protect my fragile body,
I simply thought this life just wasn’t for me.
Upon reaching adolescence, I nurtured a grudge against this so-called “god” and his backwards love.
Every night I clasped my hands, as I wondered why people relied so deeply on this man
Who lives in the sky.
His followers preach love and happiness and refuse to believe in mental illness,
They think praying is a cure-all while I believe their ignorance is amoral.
Forced to believe in this religion to fit in with my peers,
Indoctrinated to believe how mother Mary, a fourteen-year-old virgin miraculously conceived.
Watching god turn his back on man has really made me ponder,
is he a real being or is his existence fabricated?
Humans worship non-existent beings for many aeons;
I’d rather not worship Christ, I’d prefer to worship demons.
Patiently I await for your arrival
It’s like I need you for survival
Just a bit more, at the home stretch
I feel my heart beat out my chest
The musical ‘ding’, that musical sound
I run to greet you, true love I have found
I take you out, carefully I tread
To the kitchen to enjoy my garlic bread