Your finger slides down the screen,
and in your boredom you open the app.
a sea of perfect girls,
And then you begin to scroll down.
You feel your eyes begin to itch.
Your eyes start to sting.
An endless stream of salty tears seep through the cracks of your lips and hit your tongue.
You close the application.
Another piece of your confidence worn away.
Who am I?
There must be something wrong with me. I don’t fit in like the rest.
I’m not normal. I can’t get a missus or a lad for the life of me.
Am I broken? I’m not perfect.
Words like asexual and aromantic float around me
But I’m told
“You haven’t found the right person yet”,
“You’re just confused” or “It’s just a phase”
But is it really? Is this who I am?
It must be.
There is a rat
I called depression
eating at my innards
the pain goes to my throat
so I am choking on my tears
my tears of blood
would that I could
write of something else
would that I could
and I am so very tired
if I could only end it all
looking at words on the page
that reflect back to me
and where I am
and feel the same at home
no one understands my feelings
and say its your thoughts and not real things
struggling to wake up each morning is not new
its just another thing to get through
they say everything will be okay
but really it’s just getting used to it in a way.
I’m aching, the pain is breaking.
I’m sick of faking everything thing i’m thinking.
They tell me to be true, live as who I am.
Do they not know that life is just full of lies.
They tell me I can’t love who I love
tell me to be normal that
its “just a phase”
people telling me this then saying that
I can’t take it, think I need acting lessons
there was this dog
covered in smog
all on his own
no one to hold
crying all night
a man came alone
made the dog feel like he belongs
the lived happily together
the young boy cried
as he flew to the floor
his thoughts in despair
his body at war
he hates the way he feels
he just wants to fit in, though
every time he tries
he feels himself become is own foe
he wishes to be the same as all those boys
yet he never can fit in
as he knows hes different from deep within
if life can take someone
u never imagined to lose
it can replace it with someone u never imagined to have
love is a beautiful thing
but can be a disaster if its only ment to be a fling
live laugh love
but be brave
but the real one stays
A boy filled with grief and regret,
battles through a storm, cold and wet,
until eventually, he reaches a quaint little home,
the residence, a small woman alone.
“I am the oracle” her voice echoing off the walls,
a comfort fills the boy and to the floor he falls.
“ask me a question, ill give you all knowledge”
so the boy tells her his woe
which she then promptly responded
“here’S a simple solution, do what is best”
so off he went to put her knowledge to the test.
he came back the next day
to the oracle he cried,
“you’ve just made things worse, my hope has surely died”
“no, no my child”
Her voice weighed a ton
“i offered a simple solution, not an easy one”
i get lost in his eyes
they absorb me and i find myself
in a thick mystic forest filled with fae and brambles.
i get very lost in his eyes,
i cant seem to find my way out,
the brambles cut me as i get more desperate,
covering my body in deep lacerations,
the fae begin to taunt and tease me.
im completely lost in his eyes,
help me get home.
When I went Home,
I thought I saw a bird but when I got closer,
it was something unheard.
It was a plane, in a place so plain.
Why was a plane, not in the air,
Lying so unaware.
I lost a lover to a falling star,
I found my soul within a broken heart,
One wish I made.
The fog finally faded
Love was out of my way
Do you wanna know the wish I made?
I feel SHAME, like it isn’t safe to say
I wished for true love
Would you do the same?
It shined upon her face like freshly fallen snow
It shined in the air and lit up her world
It lit up all those tossless nights in the deathly dark
It lit up all those days of tears falling on her face
It lit up all those days of knives, dancing in her mind
Cold hands around her neck
Cold hands on her hips
What was this odd feeling?
They lit up in front of her
And flew, into the sky
They never shined so bright, as the old left the new
a baby shark called little ivor
saw a deep sea scuba diver
asked mum is that a manta-ray
no she grinned thats takeaway
We come from war zones inside our brain
To living with internal pain
We are told to hold it in, bottle it up and hide
To live in fear not pride ,
We can’t express ourselves for the fear of being judged
Because if we do , someone is bound to hold a grudge
In this place we must put up a front because it is so much easier to suppress rather than express.
Life isnt all good like roses
sometimes it can be and nettles
stinging you eveyway you turn
but hold you head up high
there is always a rose
waiting for you
school is horrible
and life is hard
they all think were out doing drugs in the backyard
but what they don’t see is you and me
and all of our hidden vulnerability
the things we think inside our head
man most of us wish we were dead
and worst of all is the teachers in school
who all think were just tryna be cool
they don’t see inside
the pain were trying to hide
if they really think were just acting cool
they’re really just a bunch of fools
Life is hard
and so is school
and there’s not to much u can do
you can suck it up and keep going on
or stop and talk and work it out
don’t let life get you down
be happy and don’t frown
yes this is a simple poem
but seriously talk and
don’t have life break you down.
Where am I
Woke up to some guy
Looking me in the eye
He told me I was in an accident
And looking around that seemed apparent
I saw a body on the ground
The world was spinning like a merry-go-round
Emergency services coming round the bend
I wondered to myself if it was the end
i listen to juice wrld and xxxtentacion
but they’ve both passed from drugs and guns
so soon enough nothing will release
and all the pleasure will be gone
every time your in school you do bad
they try and make you feel like you’re
dumb as a sponge and its at them
you want to lunge
I don’t wanna be in school i wanna work hard
and I don’t wanna be labelled
don’t mark my card
but at least I still have passion
its well known i hate school I love rap
this is my first time writing it
i hope you don’t think its crap.
As we gallop across the course,
I can feel her four feet stomping under me,
my heart beating,
coming up to the last jump to win,
this is my chance,
all the positive thoughts flowing through my head,
we pop over the last jump as if its nothing smooth as ever,
we have eight seconds left to cross the finish line to win,
to win the competition with a clear round with the fastest time,
as we race to the end I know we can do it,
because me and my horse are a team, and I BELIEVE.
Girls are shamed and judged
push around and nudged
to do things they don’t like
life can be tough for all girls alike
it’s time to change
to expand our range
of types of girls
and the whole world
its time to take a stand
so raise up your hand
stop knocking girls down
and find common ground.
As we trot down the road, the hounds barking a head of us
My hands are freezing trying to hold her back as we come up to the first field,
The morning fog barley rising,
She knows whats coming,
Up we go over the first log, feels like slow motion as we fly through the air,
I can still hear the hound ahead as we gallop towards them,
i can hear her breathe as slow down, each hoof hitting the ground in perfect time.
I’m here to say what’s in my head,
And believe me this is something I dread,
If I could I would of fled,
this wont be heavy so don’t jump ahead,
So in the poem I want to spread,
The fact I want to be in bed,
Did you think id say I wanna be dead,
Nah man, I just wanna be under my bedspread.
life is hard
people assuming the worst of me
but I don’t expect an apology
do you even know what im going through?
I already know my insecurities , thank you
this feeling of emptiness
cant take much more of this
or is it just pettiness
Training three times a week
in the hurling field we will meet
All to get to the County Final Day
wherever we play home or away
and to all our team mates
We will sprint out the gate.
Life can be hard at times but never give up
Everyone has bad days, don’t quit, standup
Good days will come, be patient, be kind
Live every day and leave the past behind
Life is tough but you are tougher
Tomorrow is a new day, funnily enough
I like breakfast rolls
It makes me feel like Im scoring goals
The way I eat them,
people call me sus
Like what? that’s crazy
Were not playing among us
My favourite part is the sausage
Some might call them a glizzy
They taste so good when I eat them
they make me feel so dizzy
Yes We Can
always getting told what I cant and cant do
lads saying camogie isn’t a sport
lays saying your only good for cooking and cleaning
getting told that our outfit is to revealing
it distracts the boys
you asked for it to happen with that outfit
getting judged by our looks
getting judged if we are a virgin
getting called a slut if we arnt one
in the morning
cant put on pants
my leg is a sin
I wish I could throw it in the bin
people are judgey
there is no one there to one there to help you
when the caving begins
but there is somebody there to fold you
when the pain begins.
I like to farm
It does me no harm
I milk the cows
It takes hours and hours
At the end of the day
I get my pay
When all is said and done
It really is only a bit of fun
As we step onto the field,
The other team is revealed,
The whistle sounds,
As we get ready to kick around,
We win the game,
And get a load of fame.
Farming A Bit
I like to do a bit of farming,
sure it would do ya no harming,
the money keeps going,
and the work keeps coming,
sure the cattle dump it,
we pump it,
School gets tough
school gets rough
everyday becomes a challenge
we say one thing
we do another
everyday is a replay.
We Go Wild
So come on sean kennedy,
grow a leg for Cailin,
Wild wild wild,
Wild wild wild
Come on Sorcha foley
buy us pints der now hai
on the sesh
on the sesh