St. Mary’s Secondary School, New Ross, Co. Wexford

I Am Who I Am

 

I am who I am

I can only be who I am

And not who I am told to be, a Lady

‘Your shorts are too short, that top is too small’

‘You’re overdressed, you look like a mess’

‘You should order a salad, why don’t you just eat’

It’s exhausting and I am now understanding that…

I am who I am

 

Stuck at Home

 

Stuck at home, feeling trapped, just wishing I could go back

Freedom is so far away, how much longer must I wait and stay

Here at home no friends to see, my only interaction is with family

Digital media keeping me sane, the only thing that’s on my brain

Waiting for the end in sight, along this lonely road in fright.

 

Am I Okay?

 

A question I get asked

But never want to answer

Cause to me its an anxiety enhancer

Scared to bring my feelings to the spotlight

For fear of my friends taking flight

Thinking about the future gives me a fright

Wanting someone to tell me everything’s gonna be alright

 

My Life

 

My life has always been great

So why doesn’t it feel great?

Why can I not stray away

From checking my following every day?

Why do I say I’m confident

When really I need someone to confide in?

Why does it feel as though

I don’t belong in the place I know?

 

Rebuilt

 

I’m tired

Of all the messages

“I hate to ask this, do you send?”

No, I don’t and if you hate to ask why ask?

“Ok, be like that, you’re a b***h” *blocked*

I’m ok with being a b***h if it keeps me safe.

I’m ok with people thinking I’m a freak

I don’t need their approval, or their mark on me

I don’t need their judgement to break me.

A disco ball is made up of broken glass

I’m not broken, I’m rebuilt beautiful

Like that disco ball

I’m rebuilt to be me,

Because if I’m not me,

Then who am I?

I don’t know yet, but one thing’s for sure

I’m not their doll, their toy, their pet

I’m my own person

And I’ve learnt to not believe their pretty lies of;

“I won’t let you down.”

They lied.

The only person who won’t let me down is me

Broken trust, broken promises, broken hearts, broken me,

I’m rebuilt beautiful and all those scars have a story,

A story that reminds me,

Of hurt and pain but also of bright futures.

I don’t need those promises.

Because I am rebuilt beautiful.

 

Untitled

 

I am too many chrome tabs open,

In my head, never spoken.

Assignments late or not turned in,

My soul is itching at my skin.

Stomach weighed down with black smoke,

I’m either numb or ready to provoke.

Marks spoiling brand new skin,

Leave your room. Swallow and grin.

 

Unwritten Story

 

I come from being told there is nothing I can’t do

Yet finding myself distracted and engulfed in dreams of living my life like I’ve got two

 

I come from an ever growing bucket list

Of countries and festivals and outrageous experiences that shouldn’t be missed

 

But I come from a world overcome by a virus

Where our daily lives do nothing but drain and tire us

 

I want to experience what those have before me

And live my life as an unwritten story

 

They Told Me

 

They told me to lie and to mask how I felt,

They told me to diet, to shorten my belt,

They say over and over that they just want the best,

But when I breakdown, they wont let me rest,

 

Get home fall into bed and start crying,

Wipe my tears say I’m okay but I’m lying,

The last shreds of my confidence slowly dying ,

I know that I’ll never be good enough,

Yet here I am, still desperately trying

 

I Am

 

I am brave,

I am strong,

I am worthy,

I am original,

I am beautiful,

I am wonderful,

At least that’s what I tell others to keep myself hidden,

It’s safer that way.

 

Why?

 

It’s the feeling of not being okay

But not knowing why

Its the feeling of having friends and family

Who love you

Who care for you

Yet you still feeling alone

Confused

Scared

But even then

You still dont know why

 

Tired

 

Lives gone

Families grieving

Now they’re just figures on the news

Tired of screens consuming my day

Tired of yearning human interaction

We might be sailing the same sea

But we’re all in separate boats

A smile on my face, I push through

Waiting for the day we can finally be free

 

Untitled

 

Early mornings,

Late nights.

Deep thoughts

When the sky glows bright.

Planets and oceans

Forests and meadows

Please let me escape

From the world that we know

 

Live Life

 

So I come from an age where I’m meant to know everything about my future

Decide what you want to with your life, how you wanna live it

But I am, I’m living it, day by day

But that’s not good enough

I’m meant to live till I’m wrinkled like an old shoe and walk as slow as maths class

But I’m only really meant to live till I’m 30 with kids and a man that O don’t love anymore

They quote to live life care-free, it’s an adventure, but make sure you settle down and work to live

Cause if you break the cycle that quote doesn’t refer to you anymore

 

As I Sit Here

 

As I sit here and watch the world go by, I wish I was flying high up in the sky,

But as the virus catches us one by one, I flop here until my workday is done,

But looking back I really enjoyed sunny weather and workouts outside.

But as the school year closes I think of my friends,

Who I will spent my summer nights with when this comes to an end.

 

Life

 

Life isn’t as easy as it seems for some,

For some people they have an amazing childhood,

They went to a nice school, had nice friends,

Got to do all the things available to them, had fun,

But for some people they have had it rough

Life has been tough as a child and only gets worse as you go on,

Enjoy everyday while you can you might regret it if not,

Everyone has problems big or small,

No matter where you grew up,

Enjoy every moment of you can at all

 

Lockdown Blues

 

I miss my friends,

“You’re not alone”

Yes I am.

“We’re all in the same boat”

I wish I was.

Lockdown sucks,

Weather for ducks,

It’s all for the best,

Give it a rest!