St Louis Community College, Kiltimagh, Mayo

Never Stop Tying

The whispers circulate
All the voices rotate
These thoughts in your head
Trying to push you over the edge
To push you away
To hold you out
Don’t block me out
I’m only here to help out
Tryna reach out to you
To only be shut down with “I’m fine”

Wish you would just tell me
Tell me what those voices say
But I can bet you they’re not in the right
Please just try to put up a fight
I know it gets exhausting
It’s ok to just lay down and rest
But never ever stop trying

Your head may spin
You may feel like a sin
Sometimes we share these thoughts
Trying to pull us away from the world

Just never stop trying
I’ll never stop either
I’ll be your ship
And you’ll be my anchor
Just never stop trying.

 

A Glass Orb

A glass orb is as clear as the mind.
It’s fascinating, amazing and most of all kind.
It gets knowledge and love and glows like the sky
But sometimes it feels like it could shatter and die.

Pollution and lies gather and stay
And the memories and strength start to frey
The orb becomes grimmy and dirty and yuck,
Soon it’s no longer a good place to look.

But a marval it can be, and beauty again,
It’s not that hard, bruh it’s like finding your zen.
Because the only thing better than an orb so bright,
Is splash of colour that breathes with delight.

No matter an orb, a cube or a bin,
Just find your shape, deep deep within.

 

Home Alone

She sits at home feeling numb to the bone.
Locked away in her room trying to pull herself out of the gloom she finds herself in every night.
With all her might she thinks of the happy memories which are slowly fading away.
She waits till night to finally let go of everything she’s been holding back.
She doesn’t have to fight the tears which are so eager to come out.
At night she’s finally free.

The Voice

You look online at all the girls with tiny waists and perfect body’s
“why doesn’t mind look like that” you think to yourself
because your different and that’s no good

you stand on the scales
but don’t look too close
wrap the measuring tape around your waist
but don’t pull too tight, you’re only a waste

you try to put the food in your mouth but the voice says “stop”
you say that you need this but the voice says “but just look at you, would u just stop”

stick your fingers down your throat,
throw it all up or else you’ll bloat

count the calories, they’re building up
but watch out for false advertisement
they only but thoughts thoughts in your head

“but you’re perfect, why do u think like that”
it’s not a choice, it’s the voice and that one bully from a year ago calling me fat

“you’re so beautiful” they say “i wish you could see that”
how simple it would be if it was only just that

 

I’m in the middle

I’m not known as tall,
Or as small,
I’m too innocent for the popular group,
And too normal for the weird group,
I’m not pretty,
But I’m not ugly,
I’m not smart,
But I’m not stupid,
I’m good at sport,
But not exceptional,
I’m just average,
I’m me.

Life gets rough

They tell you “ya gotta be tough”
Life gets difficult
You use your words like a catapult
Life gets depressing
They take you to a counselling session
Life seems like no more
Everyone seems to walk out the door.

To Be Someone

I meant to be smart,
But I don’t have the heart,
To go the distance,
I just don’t have the persistence

Schools to hard,
I just wanna play in the yard,
I just want to have fun,
But I still want to be someone.

Every Day

Everyday my anxiety tries to knock me down.
Each night it’s a struggle to rest
with the pressure in my chest and the thoughts in my head.
I always have a smile on my face making sure someone else’s day
can be made a little bit easier,
but all I want is someone to do that to me.
I’m desperate for someone to come up to me and ask “are you okay?”
but with how happy I act no one even thinks of me.

Silent Killer

Being alone is the silent killer
The thing that haunts us all but only reavels it’s self
to those who try and hide from it
It seeks us all out wherever,
whenever and in any form.
Demons creeping under your bed always watching
never resting your only protection your duvet and blanket.
Low self esteeme thinking your weak,
worthless is only the mind having no escape from its self
having no comfort from others
Being alone the silent killer.

How it is

Look, it is like this
If you see me would you notice me
If you hear me would you listen to me
If I was I was skinny and If I didn’t have a fat body
would you like me
If I change me
like I was not ugly or I had bad teeth
would you like me?
But I am all of them things
So I know i wont be the one.

The Bull Ring

School is a place where people can better themselves.
Not just about having books on shelves.
It doesn’t matter whether you’re wrong or right.
At least the school day’s not on until night.
It doesn’t matter of the uniform you wear.
At least the school’s not that unfair.
People should understand others fully.
It is quite cowardly to act as a bully.
School isn’t everything. It is only a part of life.
Take that into strife.

Mute

When I was young I couldn’t talk,
Teachers watching over me like a hawk,
What I lacked in education
I made up for in imagination
and motivation,
Started running where I was too fat,
within the year
I had rewrote the stats.

Perfect

They say that I’m perfect
Perfect grades, Perfect body, Perfect life
They also say just try your best but i know what they mean.
It’s easy looking in, Good at sports, Good at school, Good at everything
But they don’t every look behind the curtains or take a peek under the rug
They don’t see the endless strain, the work or words that force me to this shape
They think it’s easy‚Ķ never anxious, never insecure, never wondering is it worth it..
But why would I feel those things after all
I’m perfect.

Here and There

The darkness it’s eating you up
Just trying so hard, just wanna give up
Let go of yourself on the outside
Even if it won’t make all the wrongs right
Your head is your own battle
Emotions we all like to bottle up
It’s never easy is it

A thought here a thought there
A line here a word there
A laugh here a memory there
A girl here a boy there
A friend here a stranger there
All blend in but all stand out
A big clean fucking organized mess
And I just can’t figure it out.

My love for Music

I love to listen to music every day,
It calms me down when I am sad.
When I listen to music i feel so free,
I close my eyes and think of the sea.
Music calms me down during difficult times,
especially when i listen at night times.
I love to listen to music during road trips
and see the beautiful views from my window.
Music makes me happy.

Anywhere, but here

Funny monkeys dance on the walls
but I Close my eyes shut.
I’m anywhere but here,
I’m home.
Safe and tucked in my bed.
Why me?
I ask myself as the nurse covers me
in a warm blanket and smiles.

Judges

People judge us based on looks,
They don’t care about personality
or what we got to bring to this world,
They make fun of us for every breath
we take and every move we make,
But at the end of the day we are all equal.

Expectations

I live in a house where there’s
Constant pressure.
Get fit,get more exercise in.
You have to maintain your standard or get kicked off the team.
I have to work harder and harder to fulfill my dream,
if I’m not good enough I’ll be put on the bench .
A disgrace to my family,
I’ll never hear the end of it ever again.

Judgement

People are Consent judging us based on our looks,
They don’t care about brains or personality,
They make fun of us for breathing,
They make us seem like a weaker link,
At the end of the day we are all the same.

To stop

I want it to stop
But I cant get help
I want it to stop
But I have no one
I want it to stop
But they won’t let me die
I cant take my overthinking
So I keep drinking

 

Baking

I really like to bake,
From cookies to a big chocolate cake,
From the moment I turn the oven on,
To the moment I bite into the buttery scone,
To buying the ingredients in the shop,
To adding the extra sprinkle on top,
I really like to bake.