Ashbourne Community School, Ashbourne, Co. Meath

Womanhood

 

We can’t even leave the comfort of our home,

Without feeling like it is unsafe to walk outside alone.

 

The men they roam the streets and leer,

While a woman walking the streets is in constant fear.

 

She fears for her safety, life and her dignity lost,

As a man could come and violate her and not think of the cost.

 

Women are told to smile, laugh and look pretty,

While models “slim down” or “thicken up” while wallowing in self pity

 

Women get told to button up or pick a less revealing shirt,

While men take pictures looking up our skirts.

 

Entering into womanhood,

We soon come to realise that being a woman isn’t always good.

 

We listen to those horrific stories headlining the news,

And we feel like we have everything to lose.

 

We are women powerful and grown,

But we also want to feel safe, walking alone.

 

Love

 

Teardrops come so rarely, as emotions come and go

Feeling mournful while looking joyous.

My body turns and yearns for sleep that’ll never come,

Too afraid to talk for fear of being an annoyance.

Love for men and woman is such a burden,

When love should only be felt for one.

The things the love have caused me,

It makes me want to run.

 

Alone

 

I like to be alone

I like listening to the patter of the rain on my window

And the rustle of the trees

I like making up stories inside my head

To escape the reality of the cruel world

That lies outside my bed

But everyone knows

There is a fine line

Between being lonely

And being alone

 

Hopeful

 

Space ha that’s funny never had any.

The only space I have is the rectangular bed I’m confined to.

Always wondered why I was scared of noise,

Probably because it’s the thing that creeps up on me every few seconds of the day.

Talking, shouting, machines, creatures from the holes in the walls, water drips from the ceiling.

Still…

Hopeful.

 

But it can also be quiet, too quiet.

My feet shuffling on the bare ground, closing imaginary doors around,

Little to no sound of the roof held up above with a colourful array of thumbnails,

Feels like I’m living where life flails then pales.

Yeah I didn’t even realise we were in lockdown.

My head was already conked out with thoughts and doubts about who I am,

How can I go anywhere?

Trying to be…

Hopeful.

 

A new person is emerging, and although alerting all the alarm bells in my mind.

I finally see out of the fog, few years way too long.

But I know where I belong, feels like I’m hearing an applause.

Yeah it’s terrifying me, how others might judge or perceive.

What if everyday becomes a meeting. Did you make a good impression?

Will they meet with objection of my perception?

Might get a lot of attention, even without intent to.

I’ll do it anyway.

Keep on gripping to the…

Hopeful.

 

Equality

 

Equality is like pure happiness,

Wild and untameable,

The further we try to reach it,

The more resistance we encounter,

No matter our efforts,

There will always be a black sheep in the crowd.

 

Something Melted

 

Something melted inside me when you spoke my name

Like redemption in a halo screaming that you wouldn’t be the same.

The same as those who struck the fire from my chest

Thoes who left me bleeding and writhing in their mess.

 

Why do you make me move and wake,

Move through me and to me in a way that aches.

You’re saturated, and visceral far beyond politeness

Like all the colours, all at once and all on full brightness.

 

Make me bleed, make me cry

Make me see the things I am inside.

Make me scream with life and love and hate

Your body, your words, through my bones you resonate.

 

All We Want

 

Equality that’s all we want, its not that hard,

But no we live in a world where were told race, sexuality and gender are bad things,

Everyone has these things, what’s so bad about being yourself,

You can’t change it, people with small minds controlling the world,

Why are these things such a problem, equality, why can’t we all just be equal

 

Free Will

 

Writing poems is something I love,

Writing poems writing poems.

Yet the flows of creativity stop when I’m told to.

Irony.

It’s all about free will,

Free will to do it whenever I see fit.

When I’m sitting down,

Sitting down on the ground in my room,

In my room that makes me feel so comfortable

So comfortable so safe.

That’s where I like writing

That’s why I like writing

Because it’s a choice

I choose to

I choose to write

I chose to write 12 poems about my life.

I chose to make them deep, about me, my emotions, my mental stability.

I chose

I chose

I chose

I say that this isn’t a choice

But it’s not true

This is choice

I’m still choosing

Still choosing

Oh Freewill

Without you, freewill, what would I be?

What would I be what would I be

I would be a bundle of regret, anger, despair

Without freewill,

I wouldn’t be me

I wouldn’t be the version that I want to be

(Not that I’m the version that I want to be)

But I will be

Soon

Hopefully hopefully hopefully

With what? You guessed it

Freewill

 

Staring at the Reflection

 

Staring at the reflection and looking to the clock

My mind distorts the figure but somehow it looks so real

My bed seems to be the only safe space left,

Free of judgement

My phone serves the best distraction

After all, out of sight out of mind seems to be working

 

Untitled

 

Toxic masculinity we hear it everyday

Men gloat about it while women hide away

We hear men say ‘Its just a joke’

Whilst women laugh to not be provoked

We hear people say women are sluts and it’s wrong to be gay

But the people that say this all decided to hide away

 

 

Thoughts

 

Standing in front of the mirror,

Facing my terror,

Grabbing the fat,

Making me feel like a rat,

A rat in the sewer,

Where everybody looks at me like a tumour.

 

Expectations, expectations.

 

Books upon books to reach my dad’s expectations,

But he lost his patience,

Reaching to be the best sister expectations,

But there is no admiration.

 

Thoughts, thoughts.

 

Our Story

 

This is where our story begins,

Making memories everyday from dusk till dawn,

Laughing away at everything we love,

Listening to each other’s thoughts and stories,

Teaching each other about all we know,

We learn to love and we learn to grow,

But there’s always that on thing you don’t know,

And when it happens you then realise that person wasn’t meant for you.

And well now it looks like this is the end of that story, because I’ve ran out of pages

 

Hear my Cry

 

When will they listen

I try to explain it but it never works

Sometimes you’re so small people never see you so they walk over you

At the end of the day, no matter what I do or say

I remain silent

All I need is for someone to hear my cry

 

Memory

 

I am a memory man

My thoughts stay close to me

But the moment I grew up

To realise these thoughts

They turned to sorrow and dismay

 

Our Love

 

I told the stars about your eyes

I told the sun about your smile

I told my mam about your heart

I told my dad about your love

I told him you wouldn’t leave

Not the way he did

Although we’ve parted our separate ways

I know our love will always stay

 

Is the Bar that Low

 

Is the bar really that low for men,

That saying something a decent human being should already be thinking

Is getting the same acclaim as if he cured cancer?

Is the bar really that low for men who scream “women’s rights” at the top of their lungs,

Are considered “heroic” and “open minded”,

“A man of the modern era”, but not that this should be the normalised standard of men?

Is the bar really that low for men that the closest thing

That i’ll ever get to equal respect between him and I,

Are his words of encouragement for women in the eye of the public

But not in the dark catacombs of his mind?

Is the bar really that low for men that speaking with his chest

What women have been exclaiming,

Crying and reaching for someone to listen for centuries is a sign of worthiness and defiance

But the casual sexism he portrays with his friends isn’t held to such standard.

Yes, the bar is that low and I have to deal with it everyday.

 

Untitled

 

Killin is not gone,

The wars were never won,

From defence to hunting to enjoyment,

Killing was never the one from going on.

 

On this planet from a human’s eye killing was always necessary,

From microbes to insects to animals,

Kill or be gone.

 

No one really wants this,

But looking at the generals you start thinking is it really necessary,

Brothers fighting brothers,

species fighting species,

Can this please be gone.

 

Some people Enjoying their lives,

watching the news,

Thinking it’s all a lie,

Playing those games like you’ll never die.

 

Gaming companies selling those games,

Not promoting the change,

Fortnite , Counter Strike , Minecraft,

Whispering to us kill or be gone.

 

Are humans really going this way?

Where is Earth rolling to,

I certainly don’t want to play bowling where humans are the pins

And Earth is the rolling ball.

 

Numb

 

The sun splits the rocks

The waves carry the flocks

But still, I feel numb

 

Not numb as in nothing

Numb as in everything

All at once

Nothing, something, everything

 

Sometimes in waves

Sometimes in tsunamis

But the pit never leaves

Never lets me breathe

 

I always have tears

I always have fears

I feel like a mould

Whatever way you shape me i’ll fold

I never step out of line

Don’t want to ruin my design

 

My heads in the clouds

I feel trapped in crowds

Help me shout

Help me out

 

I Just Need to Get Out

 

I just need to get out,

Out of my room,

The beautiful flowers bloom,

Into the fresh air,

It’s only fair

 

My life is on hold,

I can’t feel the gold,

Of a beautiful summers day,

Is there any way?

 

We are in lockdown,

So all I can do is lie down

 

Lying in Bed

 

Still as a brick lying in bed

Constant pain banging in my head

My eyes are pried closed

Feeling like I want to fold

Not told what to say

With all my cards on display

I don’t know how to feel

But I know I don’t want to keel

Just need to sleep not panic

Get through this night that feels manic

 

Life

 

Life is hard, like clay

My mind straying array

Feel like running away

Everyone telling me its okay

But its not, and nobody would understand

Put my emotions on the table

Only to get them back in a bloody hand

But I try get stronger

I pray for a better tomorrow

I cant feel like this any longer

 

Lying at Night

 

Lying at night overthinking life,

Sitting awake thinking am I a mistake,

The thoughts flying round,

All are loud, bold, profound,

The best years of your life they say,

Well when will they start,

How long do I stay.

 

She Drifts

 

She drifts by day by day,

Waiting for something to break her out of her slum,

Schoolwork’s too much and she has already skipped lunch,

Will she find a way out before it’s too much.

 

Fading Away

 

Fading away

Are the days

When will this be over, they say

No matter our efforts

Drowned in tears

2 weeks become over a year

 

Untitled

 

As the weather starts to get clearer

We all start to look in the mirror

Summer body pending

Never ending mind bending thought

Should I stop eating?

Fleeting those thoughts from my mind

I am myself

Put those thoughts on the shelf

Start a new chapter

Dismiss my captor

 

Today

 

The sun is shining

The future is frightening

Children aren’t playing

Everyone’s complaining

 

Scared of dying

Sick of crying

Afraid of trying

Resorted to lying

 

Chance Redemption

 

I cornered him on his yacht after taking out his guards, shotgun barrel by my side

I stared him straight in his eyes and told him, ‘any last words? Not much longer will you be alive’

He looked around in dismay to find he had no protection,

He’d better pray to god that he gets a next life because of resurrection

The man who took it all from me, my possessions, my pride, my family.

I’ve come here to kill him on the spot, and watch him squabble worthlessly

But standing here in front of him, perhaps I let him slide,

A hate fuelled circle will remain alive otherwise

‘Any last words?’ he asks. Certainly not for you.

Go to hell, and while you’re there say hi to your family too.

I stare him down and say, ‘Was debating on keeping you living.

But you’re still a spiteful prick, so I’ll do you a favour, send you to where you belong,

The land of the non-living’

 

Teenage Years

 

Our teenage years gone to waste

“The best years of your life they say”

1 whole year since everything was normal

Stuck in our houses making banana bread

Walking the dogs online school, tik tok trends

Thinking when can things go back to normal

When can we have our lives back

March, April, May, June

The government don’t know what to do

Mental health is gone down the drain

Everyone suffering but pretending there ok

No story’s to tell are grandkids when we’re old

“What did you do when you were a teenager”

Stayed at home and only communicated by phone

When will this end enough is enough

We want our life back

Corona you suck

 

Cancel Culture

 

We live in this world nowadays that there’s something called cancel culture

All these young ones are like vultures ripping this gen z culture apart

Alll I want is the 00’s back with shaq not all this wack pc crap

I’m a white straight male with opinions that are not shared

Cause I’m afraid of being cancelled and all these fools are trying to council me

Saying it’s gonna be alright

But the good old days are gone the fight is over

And the future is no longer bright

 

Man of the Year

 

Man of the year

I still have problems

I look in the mirror

I look awful

Talking to myself

Do it too often

Guess what

I’m so awesome

 

An Imposter

 

There’s an imposter among us

He’s lookin kinda sus

Red be styling

Blue be wildin

 

Venting to hide

Killing to strive

Lying to survive

Trying to get an alibi

 

People Say

 

People say I look funny

And yes my nose is runny

My teeth are like a bunny

Other parts are Hella gummy

But its okay

My life still isn’t crummy

 

Fortnite

 

Got a number one victory royale

Yeah Fortnite we bout to get down get down

Ten kills on the board right now

Just wiped out tomato town

My friends just go down

I’ve revived him now we’re heading south bound

Now we’re in the pleasant park streets

Look at the map go to the mark sheets